Chapter Text
Chapter 21: Distracted Happiness
Fang was meeting with Trish today. Without me. Normally this would be the part where I said I wasn’t sure how I felt, but this time I knew. I hated it. My fists were cramping from how tight I’d been clenching them. My stomach hurt and my teeth threatened to chew a hole through my lip.
I know Fang could do this. I trust she can, but getting my body to understand it as well was a whole different story. Trish is a brain-damaged idiot, any aggression she once had was plastered to the Aaron’s floor. Reed would be there as well. So what was I worried about? I rolled the question around in my head, not satisfied with any of the half-baked answers I could come up with.
The car pulled up to our destination. Well, my destination. Since I was being a puss* and making Fang face this alone. But it was the right decision, wasn’t it? Even Naser said I did the right thing! And he never says that about anything I do! I’ve said it before, Fang’s an adult. I should treat her like one.
My mind sucked. All it did was make me worry about sh*t while saying everything will be fine at the same time. Just shut up and let’s go! I took a deep breath and popped open the door, pausing when I heard Fang do the same. I waited beside the car for her.
The ptero wrapped her arms around me before I could ask her anything, digging her snoot into my cheek in a nuzzle. “Thank you.”
“For what?” I hugged her back anyways, giving her a squeeze. I tried to keep my face as positive as I could, doing my best to make sure my conflicting emotions didn’t seep out.
“For this.” She shook me side to side. “For trusting me to face this alone… For believing in me. For not treating me like a child. For… a lot of things I guess.” A chuckle slipped out as she shook her head.
“Be careful.” I wanted to say so much more but couldn’t get my mouth to work. “I… Just be careful, please. Text me when you get the chance. Let me know the second anything happens. Please.”
“I will.” She brushed my cheek before pausing. “Hey, uh, can I kiss you? Like on the lips?” The hesitation in her voice reminded me of the distance we were still closing between us.
“I can’t think of a single instance where the answer would be no, but if you need confirmation then-” I didn’t get to finish as her lips silenced mine. I stared down her snoot cross-eyed, my brain lagging behind for a second as it processed the strange image it was receiving. I melted into the contact, almost choking on the surge of emotions it sent through me.
Gagging made Fang pull back, my lips following after her for a moment until my mind caught back up. I turned to the noise and spotted a brown ptero with his finger pointing in his mouth, retching in an exaggerated manner.
“Get a room you two!” Naser called as he walked towards us. I spotted a familiar green raptor in a paint-stained jacket following behind him who gave me a nod when our eyes met. “Canoodling in public like a couple of teenagers! Shame on you!”
Fang scoffed but stepped back anyways. “Oh come on! How often have I watched you and Naomi suck face?”
“Slander!” A hand flew to the accused chest. “Like never! Er, at least not in public I think.”
“What’s up, Fang.” Jacob nodded to her.
“Hey man. You guys got any plans?” Fang’s eyes turned to me along with everyone else.
“Uh…” Come on Anon, this is your shindig after all. “Not really?” I f*cking drew empty on ideas. “Just gonna wander around the pier and see what’s up?”
“Well… You know what? Go have some fun. Relax.” Fang had a small smile on her face. “If you like it, I'll join you next time. It’s been a long time since I last came here.”
Naser stepped past to wrap his sister in a hug of his own. They whispered personal things to each other I didn’t try to hear. Jacob clapped hands with her in a tight grip and pulled her in as well for a much less ‘tender’ and more ‘bro’ hug. He didn’t say anything, but I got the feeling his eyes said more than I could see.
“Fang.” Naser called to her as she said back in her car. “Mom and dad are proud of you. Of everything you’ve done, and how far you’ve come.”
“Jeez…” Fang’s head slumped to her steering wheel. “Wait, dads not gonna do anything is he?” Her head shot up, suddenly worried.
“Nah. Moms got him on lockdown for the next 4 hours or so.” He placed a hand on the roof of the car and leaned down to her eye level. “But he did say it, you know. That he’s proud of you.”
“Ahhh, shut up!” Embarrassment wafted from her as she squirmed in the seat, her arms covering her face. “I’m trying to focus! Quit distracting me!” Fang shook her head, literally wiping the blush from her face with her hands as she focused up. “Alright I gotta go. Love you guys.”
“I love you too, Fang.” It felt weird on my tongue, to say it out loud. I slipped it in with Naser’s hoping to hide it, but he still gave me a quick side eye.
We waved after her as she rolled out of the parking lot. My eyes followed her car until it turned down the road out of view. My body shuddered as a hand clapped me on the back.
“Alright, let’s get going before she gets too far!” Naser ran towards the parking lot, more specifically towards his red car.
“Huh?” Confusion clouded my mind as I watched the brown ptero spin back towards me and jab a thumb over his shoulder. “Wait, what are you doing?”
“We’re following her right?” Naser had a grin on his face. “That’s why you invited us here, to tail her and make sure that bitch doesn’t pull anything?”
“What? No!” I shook my head, waving my hands in front of me.
“Really?” Jacob raised an eyebrow.
“Then why are we here? I got my binoculars and everything!” Naser reached into his jacket and pulled out a small set of focals.
“Because…” Why are we here? I didn’t want to sit at the apartment alone. But if it was just loneliness then why didn’t I have us meet at the parlor or the park? Why this place? I think I’ve seen it in animes… “Because I wanted to.” Yeah, that’s what it was. I wanted to go here.
The pier jutted over the ocean. Covered in food stalls and rides. A big Ferris wheel and a coaster taking up the majority of it. Families and teenagers meandered around, giving the air a pleasant vibe. Despite the cold a modest crowd was still out. This is what I think it would have felt like to go to the fair that would roll through Rock Bottom if my parents ever took me.
God, I’m such a loser.
“So wait.” Naser’s voice broke through my deep thoughts. “We’re just gonna chill here?”
“Yeah.” That sums it up.
“Good job!” He flashed a smile and threw a thumbs up at me, the sun gleaming off his teeth. “You’ve grown, Anon! That was a test!” Bullsh*t you idiot, you were gung-ho to tail her.
“Thank god.” Jacob sighed, slouching over. “Yeah, I wasn’t completely comfortable with the whole stalking thing.” He shivered in the cold and turned to look at the pier. “I’ve never been, but it’s got heat lamps so I’m game to stay.”
“So…” We awkwardly shuffled as I tried to say something.
Naser jumped in to save me. He wrapped an arm around our necks and pulled us towards the gate. “Just the boys! Bachelor party!”
“You seem awfully excited.” Jacob was the first to pull out of the choke hold.
“What can I say?” Naser tightened his hold on me when I tried to slither out. “I haven’t been here since I was a tyke. And I wasn't big enough to ride the roller coaster then!” There was a child-like glee in his voice that relaxed me.
“I’m glad I can help your childhood dream. Now can you let me go?” I tugged at the arm around my neck.
The grip tightened. “I don’t know. Maybe you should tell me what that little thing was you slipped in when we were saying bye to Fang?” Naser’s arm squeezed enough to become uncomfortable. “I heard it! You aren’t slick!”
“What?” I choked out, grabbing his wrist. “I love her, sue me!” The arm pulled back, making me stumble as I had prepared to rip it free.
“Yeah yeah, I’m just ribbing you.” Naser strode a head of us before cutting a 180 and pointing a claw in my face. “Of course this means you must step your game up. No more passive bull crap. I’m talkin about dates! I’m talkin about cooking! I’m talkin about romance! And lucky for you, you got two veterans in the game right here to show you how it’s done!” His claw shifted to Jacob before jabbing his thumb back to himself.
“So wait…” Jacob shrank. “Is this like a practice date now?”
“No.” I quickly put a stop to that. “We’re here to have fun and relax.”
“And give you pointers on dating!”
“I don’t know how good I’ll be.” Jacob ran a hand over his buzzed head. “To be honest Skyler kind of snatched me up and never let go. I didn’t do much.”
“And Fang snatched Anon, so it all works out.”
“Guys.” I kept my voice calm. “Let's have fun. Worry about sh*t later.”
“Alright, alright.” Naser stuck his hands up. “I wasn’t trying to worry you or nothin’. Was hyping you up actually.”
I appreciated it, honestly I did. There was a part of me that still worried about his acceptance for some reason. It was nice to know he was in my corner now, so to speak.
We had to pay a small fee to enter the pier and made sure we also got some tickets for the rides and games. Couldn’t have a proper date without them apparently. Weirdly enough my finances were actually growing despite paying half the rent, so I wasn’t too gauged by the price.
I hesitated on the other side of the gate, looking around at the different strangers and stalls. What the f*ck am I doing here? I finally chose to go out and do something and I pick a dumb f*cking pier? So f*cking stupid…
‘Whap!’ An eep squeaks out of my mouth, my butt tucking in as my hands instinctively covered my stinging buns.
“Careful, that belongs to your sister.” My head whipped to the chuckling green Raptor before finding the f*cker who dared.
Naser was shaking his hand in the air. “Dang! That was a crisp one!”
“The f*ck was that for you dick!” I growled and scowled at the crippled ptero, feeling my scar twist my face.
“Making sure your head’s out of your ass.”
“I'm about to cram your head up yours!” I lunged forward and got an arm around his neck, my other hand gripping his chin thingy and shaking his head side to side.
“Is that how you want to play!?” Naser's voice challenged me, and I could faintly hear Jacob laughing at the display. An arm hooked between my legs, and before I could tighten my grip, I was lifted off the ground. “Hup! Huagh!” I squirmed out of his grip, hooking a leg around his neck.
“Let me show you what they taught me in- Blerg!” Stars flashed in my vision, the breath knocked from my lungs as I was dropped on my head. “Mother f*cker!” I grabbed the back of my head, rolling back and forth, kicking my legs in the air. I could hear Naser screaming as well.
“Oh f*ck, are you two alright?” A green blur moved in my teary vision. I could hear Naser shouting still and I shook my head to clear my sight, searching for him.
He was also on his back, one leg sticking straight out in the air. “Oooohhh SHIIIIT! Cramp! Quick, someone grab my heel and push my toes! Please! AAAAHH!” Jacob stepped up, doing as he was told. “Someone get some mustard packets!”
A few minutes later we sat at a table in embarrassment right under a heat lamp that had me sweltering and the two dinos cozied up.
“Is your head alright?” Naser asked, rubbing his calve.
“Yeah… Your leg ok? Did you not stretch this morning?”
The ptero jostled me and shrugged. “We’re getting old I guess.”
Jacob rolled his shoulders. “God I hope not. My body’s going to shut down on me.”
Naser slapped his knees and stood, testing his leg for a second. “Well let’s get this play date on the way huh? What’s first?” Both sets of eyes turned to me again.
Really? I know I chose to go here but why am I the one who has to pick where we go! Let’s see… “How about the roller coaster?”
“What? Nah.” Jacob shook his head. “Come on, everyone knows you save the big stuff for later.”
“Then what do you guys want to do?”
“Let’s wander and check out the stalls. Get a little bit of snack food, maybe some souvenirs.” Naser hooked his fingers into the pocket of his jacket and struck a strange pose. “Follow me, ladies.”
A few moments later I had some cotton candy and the carnivores each were buying hotdogs from a yellow Troodon. My mouth was flooded with a sweet, sugary cloud that had me seeing stars again. I don’t remember the last time I ate something that wasn’t salty or greasy. And it was damn good. I wanted to eat more sweets… I should make cookies or cake or something for Fang after she gets back from practice.
My taste buds soured at the thought of her, my mind flashing to Trish, to her crying beneath me. The paper cone in my hand crinkled as I squeezed it.
“What a line!” Naser’s call pulled me out of my thoughts. He had a large hoagie in his claws which he chomped in half with a single bite. “But I’ll tell ya.” He paused to swallow. “That lady is making a killing here.”
“Sure as sh*t better be…” Jacob grumbled, sniffing his dog for some reason. “Charging 8$ for a single grilled hot dog…” He downed it in one bite. Raptor Jesus carnivores are scary. “Alright, we blowing some tickets?” He jabbed a thumb towards a booth. “Promised Sky I would get her a plushie.”
“Skyler doesn’t look the type to want plushies.” I tried picturing the rocker with a pile of beanie babies.
“She’s not but I promised.” He shrugged.
“Gotta get your girl a stuffed animal on the date, that’s just the law!” Naser shoved the rest of his hotdog down, a large grin never leaving his face. He was being oddly cheerful today, maybe he needed the day off?
The first game booth was one where they set bottles up on a stand and you had to hit them off with a baseball. I’d seen it in anime’s, during the school festivals. The trick was that the space for the bottles to fall was small, and you had to knock them all off the platform.
I could do this, right? Plus I had the advantage of not having my girlfriend watching me actively embarrass myself like the poor guy next to me. No exceptions to fail, no one to let down. Oh yeah, this was my element.
My toss hit, scattering the bottles and bouncing them around the box. The last one rolling to the edge before stopping short. Eh. I shrugged. These things are rigged anyways.
Jacobs throw whiffed the stack entirely, bouncing off the wall and almost landing back in his hands again.
“SSSTRIKE!” Naser’s shout drew the attention of everyone around us. He struck a pose with a finger in the air, the last bottle tipping over the edge. The ptero pointed both fingers at me with a smug smile on his face. “Isn’t this supposed to be one of you monkey’s strong point?”
I couldn’t actually bring myself to be mad at the racist remark, but I did frog his leg while he was focused on picking out a plushie for Naomi. A stuffed alligator joined us on the journey to the next booth.
“It’s all in the wrist! The wrist!” Naser stood behind me, coaching me through the technique. I held the dart right in front of my face, staring down the length of it and picking a cluster of balloons. One dart, two balloons needed. The odds were not in my favor. Pop! “Close but no cigar!” The co*cky ptero flaunted his newly acquired stuffed gorilla. “You suck at this man!”
“No, you’re just weirdly good at these.” There’s a trick to it! There has to be!
Jacob was hunched over dejectedly, having missed out with a flubbed throw that almost hit the poor teenage girl running the stall. He slapped his knees and stood, nose tilted back as he straightened up. “I pick the next one.” He cracked his knuckles, a grin pulling at his lips and showing off his sharp teeth. We followed him across the pier, watching as he rolled his shoulders and stretched.
Oh, I see what he's doing. A strong-man game was on this side, a man in a unitard with a curly mustache flexing his muscles on the sign. A bored human sat next to the tower, or tower’s really, as there were multiple. A few different sized hammers as well. His face lit up when he saw us coming, though faltering for a second when he looked at me, his smile becoming a little more forced than it was.
“Welcome! Here to test your might? To see who is truly a man and who is a noodle armed baby?” He spun the hammer in his hands over his head and flipped the handle towards jacob. “Only two tickets.” The raptor snapped off two and gave them to the eccentric man. “Species?”
“Utahraptor.”
“Ah, I thought you looked rather large for a raptor.” The man pulled the hammer back and swapped it with a larger one before gesturing to the tower in the middle. “I got a good feeling about you. Don’t damage the property now, it's my living after all!” He tipped his hat and bowed.
Jacob tested the hammer for only a second before sucking in a breath and hefting it skyward and slamming it down after a quick step in. My eyes snap up as I try to follow the speeding piece of metal as it flies towards the bell. Its momentum tapered off as it grew closer and closer before barely tapping the top with a little tink.
“Whew! Thought I didn’t have it for a second.” He rolled his right shoulder, grimacing slightly.
“I don’t know… I didn’t hear anything.” Naser feigned ignorance.
“What? Come on bullsh*t, we all heard it ding!”
“Relax my sharp toothed friend! My superior hom*o sapien hearing did indeed pick up your efforts! And such a feat of strength should not go unrewarded!” He grabbed the hammer from the raptors hand and twirled it over his shoulder again before gesturing to a pile of small stuffed toys. “You get one from the small pile.”
“From the small pile?” Jacobs' eyes tracked over the pile of larger plushies.
“Well perhaps if you could really put your back into it and give us a ding worthy of a large reward?” The man raised an eyebrow with a smirk on his face.
“Nah I see what you’re doing… Smart though.” The raptor wasn’t falling for the vendor's taunts.
“You cannot fault a man for trying. What about you, gentleman? Care to put your large friend to shame?”
I stepped up, rolling the sleeves of my jacket up. Before quickly giving up. Turns out leather sleeves don’t really roll up… Anyway, I was feeling pretty confident when I ripped off two tickets.
“Species?” His question caught me off guard, making my brain freeze.
“Anon.” That's your name you dumbass…
“I was jesting, sir!” His smile became forced again as he stared at me. “Right this way!”
My ego was my downfall. Or maybe it was my insecurities? When the guy offered up a larger hammer, I turned him down. When he pointed out the smaller tower, I turned him down. So it was no one else's fault but mine when my hit came up a few inches short. Thankfully, with a little help from peer pressure, Naser used the same equipment, leaving us both prizless.
The cart gently rocked in the ocean breeze, upsetting my stomach. It reminded me a little too much of being on that damn ship. My gaze was listless over the side as we slowly moved. The Ferris wheel might not have been the best decision for a ride. It was quiet, too quiet. The whole reason I was here right now was to avoid the quiet! But for some reason I couldn’t force my mouth open to say something.
Naser and Jacob sat awkwardly across from me. One drumming his fingers and the other clearly pretending to play on his phone. Someone say something. Please…
My thoughts started to drift to Fang, to myself, to how much sh*t I cause no matter who I try to be. I followed Fang, and she hated it. But when I follow myself, I hate it! I hate sitting here like a coward while she goes to face her fears! But I also hate that it makes me feel like I don’t trust her to handle herself! What the f*ck can I do to make things f*cking simple!
A touch in my shoulder jolted me out of my pity. At some point I must have hunched over and dug my hands into my head, forcing me to pry them away to look at the contact.
“Ferris wheel is the perfect moment.” Naser had sat next to me, his arm wrapping around my shoulder and giving it a squeeze.
“Perfect moment..?” What? f*ck, did I miss something while stuck in my head?
“Of course! The atmosphere, the privacy! All perfect to make a move.” Oh, the whole date thing. “Trust me, Fang doesn't look like the romance kind of gal, but no girl can deny this moment.” I stiffened up as the ptero slid closer, snuggling up to my side. “Oh Anon… It's so chilly this high in the air. If only a big, strong, courteous man could spare some of his warm blooded body heat!” I quickly put a stop to that, shoving him away with a free hand.
“You guys have a weird relationship…” Jacob comments on the scene.
“I’m completely normal, he’s the weird one.” I shoved the ptero harder when he started making kissy faces.
“Oh right, sure. The college student is the weird one, not the scared, secret otaku, military veteran dating outside his species.” The hand he had around my shoulder loosened. “I’m just trying to get you to relax! Fang’s there, you're here. Nothing can be done.”
“I've been around Fang for a while now.” The green raptor’s voice was soft, the tone sparking an ember of frustration in my gut, as if I were fragile. “I’ve seen her at her lowest, her roughest. But I’ve also seen her grow. Trust me. Her eyes were clear, she's got this.”
“I know that. I know. But I just…” I sagged into the seat and ran my hand over my face, flinching away when I brushed my nose. “What if I made the wrong choice! What if something happens because I'm here! Up in a f*cking ferris wheel while Fang is face to face with that f*cking-”
“Then something happens.” Jacobs' calm voice cooled the flames that wanted to roar inside me. “That’s life.” That's life? Bad sh*t can happen because I f*ck up and I should just accept that!?
“He’s right, you know.” Naser’s grip tightened again and he had a f*cking smile on his face. “We just have to make the best decisions we can at the time and hope it doesnt f*ck up. If it does then we learn from it. Hindsight and all that.” His words flashed me back to the office with an old woman.
“You sound like Dr. Seymour…” The thought of the old woman doused the embers in my chest, helping me wrangle in my spiked emotions.
“How did that go by the way? I heard some stuff happened and it sounded pretty bad.” Jacob jerked as Naser kicked him in the shin. “sh*t! Is it sensitive? Fang usually talks a bit about her sessions but she was quiet this time.”
Was Fang protecting me? I mean I wasn't opposed to talking about it. Nothing about it was really ‘sensitive’. “Good, I think. I don’t know really… wasn’t what I expected at least.” The centric old bat was strange. “Dr. Seymour was good, I’ll admit. Now that I can think about it I can see how well she steered my thoughts and the conversation.”
“What’d she say?” He flinched again when Naser kicked him harder and glared at the ptero. “What? What’s the issue here? Is that a weird question?”
“It’s a bit insensitive. Are you autistic by chance?”
“Nah it’s fine.” I staunched the argument before it could begin. “You guys are probably my closest friends. If I couldn’t talk to you, I couldn’t talk to anyone. I mean Jacob, you gave me your sandwich when I was on death's door. That puts you number one in my books.”
“What!?” Naser’s hand flew to his chest and his jaw dropped open. “I stitch you up, literally pull you from the reaper's hands and you rank a sandwich above that! Yeah, you're definitely dying next time!”
“Hopefully there won’t be a next time. I mean, how many people can you have trying to shoot you?” For some reason Jacob's comment made me laugh. Probably more than he would guess. “So what was the problem?” He retaliated against Naser’s kick this time, slamming a hard one into the ptero’s shin. “Dude you're about to piss me off.”
“Well apparently I'm a pushover.” I shrugged.
“Really? Well I could have told you that without a doctor's appointment.” Your insight is appreciated, Naser. “Gonna expand on that?”
“She thinks I follow what other people want instead of what I actually want.”
“And what do you actually want?” The raptor crossed a foot over the other, rubbing at his shin.
“I guess I wanted to go here with some friends?” Why did I choose here again? It was late last night as Fang and I laid in bed. I just said the first thing that came to my mind.
“Huh… Well for what it's worth I’m not opposed to the idea of a guys night every now and then. But we're going bowling next time.”
“Don’t even think of bringing Ripley.” My nose throbbed at the thought of the large ptero.
“Oh come on! You're going to have to bond with him eventually!”
Jacob chuckled. “Do it like I did, build a big, metal building with him.”
“I’m doing it like all men should. On his deathbed, a firm handshake, and the nod of a head.” The same plan I hoped to use on my own father.
We bromanticly watched the sunset at the top of the Ferris wheel. Naser was right, this is definitely a place I’ll have to take Fang one day. This was nice. We should go out more, not just the boys, but everyone. Rosa and Stella too. All my friends.
I leaned on the railing, sucking in a deep breath of the ocean's salty air. It tickled a memory in my head… of sitting in the dark looking at the waves. I didn’t fight the memories this time, instead embracing the rush of emotions that swirled in my gut. I wasn’t suicidal anymore. I wasn’t about to blow my brains out. I should be able to face this without breaking down into a mess. But my eyes still watered and my scar throbbed when I saw the sand. I could still feel it. Gritty and stained in blood.
I slid my wallet out of my pocket. Something had been whispering to me for a long time now. The empty brass case rolled between my fingers, dangling over the edge of the pier. It would be so simple to let my hand tip over and drop it into the dark waves. Never think about it again. But the thought alone made me tighten my grasp. Why couldn’t I be done with you? Just do it, Anon. Throw this chunk of metal into the ocean.
But I couldn’t… We were connected.
“What’s that?” Jacob was suddenly beside me when my senses returned to the world. Naser too, his eyes wide and mid throat swipe locked on the Raptor.
“It’s the bullet I tried to kill myself with…” I mumbled. No use trying to hide anything, what else could it be?
“Uhhh…” The Raptor’s eyes were wide, his eyes unfocused as he seemed to process what I said. Wait…
“Did… Did we not tell you that yet?” Surely we had to have mentioned it at some point, right? I racked my brain but could only faintly remember talking to them at the parlor.
“No, no you did not.” He scratched the back of his head. “But it’s not too surprising thinking back on it. Makes a whole lot of stuff make sense now.”
“So thinking of tossing it in the ocean?” Naser placed a hand on my shoulder and steered the conversation back. “Burial at sea? A little poetic for a Navy man.”
“I don’t know.” I squeezed the case tighter, until my hand shook from the pressure. “I don’t know why but I can’t seem to part with it.”
“Then don’t.” The ptero shrugged nonchalantly. “Why do you have to get rid of it? Like it or not it played a part in who you are today. Hell, it’s the reason you’re here today.”
My brain froze. I didn’t have to get rid of it? But why not? Just looking at it made me sick to my stomach. It reminded me of who I was and how I felt sitting on that beach. I didn’t want to think of that stuff, I wanted to bury it in the bloody sand and leave it. I wanted to run… That’s what it was, I think. Deep down I knew getting rid of it would be running away from what I did. And I was done with that.
“Probably not really comparable, but I keep movie tickets in my wallet.” Jacob’s voice pulled me from the back of my mind. Confused, Naser and I turned to him. Where was he going with this? The raptor rubbed at his arm bashfully. “I mean, like, even the bad ones. Like this one time Sky and me went and watched this awful one that she really liked, like super liked. I was a dick and mocked it the whole time, and this was in that rough patch we had when she left her parents to live with me. Turns out it was a series she watched with her dad while growing up and I was trashing it. It led to a big argument, really big. Like, I slept on a bus bench.” Jacob leaned on the rail and slipped a piece of paper from his wallet. “But I still keep the ticket. A reminder of what happened and why.”
“Can’t keep the good memories without the bad ones.” Naser’s smile had returned. “Remember what I said about Naomi and I?” He stressed the ‘I’, eyes flicking to Jacob.
Kind of? I remember him bragging about how well their relationship was now. Regardless I got the message they were pushing. I dropped the brass back into my wallet right beside the feather. My gaze lingered on the quil.
“Is that one of Fang’s?” I turned to see Jacob leaning over me.
“Yes? Is that weird?” I was suddenly self conscious. Is it the equivalent of keeping someone’s hair in your wallet?
“Not really, I don't think.” He looked away, rubbing his chin. “It’s just… different. Cleaning up Sky’s tail feathers when she’s molting is such a chore I haven’t thought of grabbing a momento.”
“It’s a little weird. I mean I don’t have feathers and I’ve never had to preen someone before so maybe that’s why.” The ptero shook my shoulder. “But hey! I’ll only judge you a little, promise. Now-” Naser pushed back from the rail and spun a 180 and struck another pose. “-to the roller coaster!”
Another shocking revelation, but I have never been on a roller coaster. The good: They’re fun! The bad: They’re nauseating… This wasn’t even a ‘big’ one either according to Naser and Jacob. But it still managed to leave my knees weak and my stomach rolling. The Ferris wheel did not adequately prepare me for the coaster. Naser snapped a picture from the photobooth of me gripping the handles in a white knuckled hold with my eyes screwed shut, my scar twisted ugly. But past all that it was fun. I think… I don’t know how many I can ride in one day though.
The rest of our tickets quickly went to pizza and arcade games. I haven’t been to an arcade in a long time, it was nice to just mindlessly play crappy shooting games with friends. Or crush them, when it came to a nice, old-fashioned round of Mortal Wombat.
“You’re good at games.” Jacob had actually put up a fight, much better than Naser’s button-mashing.
“One of the few things I’m good at, actually.” I backed away from the cabinet, letting the kids behind us have their turn.
“You play anything on that new Xrox yet?”
I shook my head. “Not really. Nothing new at least.”
“The new cod is on the pass now. It sucks but it’s something to do.” He stretched up high. “I got an hour or two after work before we go to the parlor, and on days we don’t have to perform or practice I have all afternoon.”
I followed him towards the table Naser was holding down for us, a piece of crust hanging from his mouth. “The parlor is slowly getting more packed. Soon y’all are gonna have to upgrade establishments.”
“You got that little stego friend of yours to thank for that.” Stella had been advertising for Silver Dream, shilling hard to her audience. It was under the promise that if they made it big she would be our first choice for a digital artist. “Gonna be a sad day when we have to leave Freddie’s though.”
“Yeah…” The portly man had grown on me. Not that we’ve said a word to each other, but it was clear he was a good guy.
Naser chomped down on his crust when he saw us walking up. “So, get your ass beat as well?”
“Had to give him one win today.” Bullsh*t, I dragged your ass 3-0.
“Well, suns getting real low. Heard anything from Fang yet?”
I shook my head. “Nope. I sent her a text earlier but she hasn’t responded.” I wasn’t about to badger her, not when she’s trying to focus. The silence was unnerving, but expected.
“Not too long now, It's been a few hours. They should be finishing whatever it is.” My phone dinged in the middle of Naser’s sentence. “Boom! Called it! That's Fang right?”
I fumbled with my pocket and nearly dropped the device.
Fang: Yo I’m here dweeb :)
That one text made me deflate with a sigh. I collapsed onto the seat next to Naser and Jacob when my knees gave out. It went ok… I don’t know what happened, but It's over. Thank god…
A clawed hand gripped my bald head, pulling up on my skull until I stood. “Come on now, don’t leave us in suspense. How did it go?” I slapped Naser’s grip from my dome.
“I don’t know, but she's here.”
“Then why did you almost pass out?” Jacob brow crinkled as a small frown settled on his face.
“She called me dweeb… That means it went good I think.”
“Then let's go!” I jerked when Naser slapped me on the back and started strutting towards the door. I exchanged a look with Jacob before quickly following after him. The walk back was quick, most of the crowd appeared to have gone home for the evening, leaving mainly groups of teenagers meandering about. “Here.” The ptero spun around and tossed something towards me. I flinched but managed to catch it, the gorilla plush staring back at me with a stitched on grin. “I couldn't let you face her empty handed, not with Jacob and I flaunting our gifts.”
I tucked the gorilla under my arm. “Thank you, Naser. You too, Jacob.” I turned to the raptor. “For coming here with me today. I… I really needed this.” It was fun. Like real fun.
“Hit me up. For something like this or for some games. I suck but I still like em.” The raptor held his hand out and I clasped it, giving the firmest handshake I could.
“Definitely.”
“And remember.” Naser placed both hands on my shoulders. “Every girl likes a little romance. Get some chocolate someday or some roses. Go take care of her.” He gave me a light push towards the parking lot.
I turned and gave them both a nod before straightening back forwards. My turn now. I could see Fang parked at the entrance waiting for me. With a deep breath I popped the door and slid in.
Fang had a smile on her face, but I could tell it was a little forced. But her eyes brightened when they locked on mine. Her makeup was gone too…
“Did you have fun?” I snapped to attention when she spoke, her voice a little more raspy then it usually was.
“Yeah…”
“Who’s that?” Her amber eyes flicked to my lap.
“Huh?” I looked down and saw the gorilla in my lap. “Oh uh, yours.” I held it out for her. “I mean I got it for you.” Hopefully, the little dance I made him do distracted her from my idiocy.
“For me? You shouldn't have…” The ape was squeezed into her chest. “Naser was right, I do have a thing for monkeys.” Racist mother f*cker.
“So…” I fiddled with the seat belt instead of putting it on. “How did it go?” I almost choked on my tongue when I asked. But this wasn't something I could put off asking. No matter what the answer was, I had her back 100%.
Fang was silent for a bit, hugging the toy tighter. “... Good.” Her head tilted to the side and looked at me.
“Thats… good. So are you two like…” I didn’t get to finish my thought as her snout shook back and forth.
“Nope. But we talked, or really I talked. Trish could barely speak, she brought a note pad with her to write what she wanted.” Fang shook her head harder. “Anyway, there's no fixing what happened. But we talked and agreed to move on. Separately.” I sagged into the seat with relief. I always had issues with that purple bastard and I’m f*ckin stoked she’s gone. And things ended mutually! Trust me, I was ready to step in and deal with things, but it felt dirty to pick on someone so pathetic. But this couldn't have been easy on Fang, regardless of what she's saying.
“Are you ok?”
The ptero signed and slumped against the steering wheel. “No. But I sat out here for a good 30 minutes and made sure I was all out of tears so I’m bone dry now. But… this might sound weird, but I feel like I might feel better later? Does that make sense?”
“Like you feel like sh*t because it had to happen, but feel better now that it’s done?”
“Kinda. I don’t know.” Her eyes drifted to stare out the window and she whispered. “I really f*cked her up…”
I wanted to say ‘Damn right you did!’ but the tone in her voice made me think that wouldn’t make her feel better. Fang was kinder than I was, she shouldn’t feel bad for what she did to that bitch. Trish was lucky I chose not to go.
I didn’t say anything, but I offered my hand, twining it with hers when she accepted the gesture. “I love you.” She blushed her eye flicking from the window to me before snapping back.
“I love you too, Anon. Thank you.”
I chuckled softly. “For what?”
“For that.” Her wings shuffled behind her nervously. “For loving me… This version of me.” The gorilla was squeezed tight against her.
“I love every version of you. I just got lucky enough to get the best one.”
“Oh shut up!” The red ptero squirmed in her seat, trying to hide in her feathers. “God you’re such a sap! Where did that come from!? Jeez!”
“I only speak the truth, believe what you want.” I shrugged my shoulders.
I heard a hiccup slip from the wall of feathers and I tightened my grip on her hand. “f*ck…” She cleared her throat. “Gimme a second. Not as dry as I thought I was… Whew! Ok, ok I’m good.” Slowly the wings lowered and shining amber eyes peered out at me. “I needed that.”
“Fang?” It was still weird how nervous I felt asking stuff like this.
“Hm?”
“Can I kiss you?
She let out a laugh, hiccuping in the middle before fizzling out into a giggle. Her wings folded back snuggly against her back and she tilted her snout towards me. “You can.”
Short and sweet, but enough to hopefully silence the doubts in her head like it did for mine. You are so f*cking strong Fang… And I promise. No more self-pity. I’m not a man worthy of standing by your side, but I’ll do everything I can to grow and become one. We’re equals, it’s time to start pulling my weight.
